REFLECTIONS ON CHANGE, SPIRITUALITY, BELIEF, FAITH, PRAYER, AND MORE
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Wednesday, 3/18/09 - "SEEING PAIN"
Yesterday was a day unlike any I have experienced in a while. I witnessed so many people in soul-deep pain and confusion. On my own, I felt totally inadequate to help. Thank God, I don't carry the message alone. God is always with me.
One girl lost a son to addiction within the year and is experiencing pain that a mother who has not lost a child can only guess at how it feels. It's painful just thinking about that happening and I can only imagine the horror of living with the reality. This child of God finally surrendered the secret that she was drinking again and doesn't want to live that way anymore. Thank God. This is a beginning.
Another woman has just started attending Al-Anon and is in that place of utter torment and no understanding of what is wrong or how to lessen it. She is desperate for a shred of hope that something can help her. Like many of us before finding recovery, she has been trying to understand and fix herself for 30 years - with no success.
My phone rang all day. Recovering people I work with regularly were calling as well as those who call infrequently. They were all having some sort of crisis. Wow! The planets must be aligned in some weird way.
I had to remember to take care of myself and laid down for a while shutting 'everything' out. I needed to regroup. I called on my God to refresh my mind and spirit.
Here is what I hope for all those in deep conflict, doubt, fear, and hopelessness: THE SPARK Once more my Higher Power hear Once more I call on you dear God Place deep inside the spark of hope That one day makes us fully whole
In one who's lost a cherished child Another taken back the drink This one lost in her own pain That one struggling alone again
Breathe your breath oh God Upon that tiny hopeful spark Transform into a roaring flame That victory may be won - be claimed
I'm sober in AA since July 5th 1985, and a grateful member of Alanon since November 2004.
I joined the "blogosphere" in September, 2008.
In December 2011 I became a grandmother for the first time and now understand why it's such a big deal. I'm wildly in love again with that little guy.