I picked up a book at the library the other day kind of like closing my eyes, pointing my finger, touching a book and choosing it to read. It is a biography by Anne Lamott called "Traveling Mercies - Some Thoughts on Faith". I had never heard of the book or the author, but it looked interesting.
"THOUGHTS ON A BOOK"
On the back cover it said, "With an exuberant mix of passion, insight, and humor, Anne Lamott takes us on a journey through her often troubled past to illuminate her devout but quirky walk of faith......tells how, against all odds, she came to believe in God and then, even more miraculously, in herself."
This grabbed my attention. I could identify with having a troubled past. I could also relate to the idea of a quirky walk of faith since I had traveled many highways and byways of religious and spiritual thought. I also believe that I have miraculously survived alcoholism and my crazy mind against all odds. I believe in God and now believe in myself.
I have read about a sixth of the book so far and have found two quotes that stick in my mind.
Here is a one that struck me as totally hilarious. Maybe my sense of humor is warped - maybe not. But if I'm laughing, then it's got to be a good thing.
"At Christmas there were Fishhouse punches so alcoholic you could have sterilized needles in them..." p.27
(Rumor has it that the Fish House Punch Recipe was created in colonial times at the State Fishing and Social Club in Pennsylvania. The passage of so much time would indicate that this punch tastes better than its name suggests.)
There was another one with a very different effect on me. It describes quite well the place I found myself at the point of awaking from my last drunk and totally surrendering.
"And since this side of the grave you could never know for sure if there was a God, you had to make a leap of faith, if you could, leaping across the abyss of doubt with fear and trembling." p.45
I was full of escalating doubt and fear as I arrived at the point of total surrender to alcohol. I took that leap of faith and went for broke. When my eyes opened from that last drunk, I made a decision to rely on God only and completely. I realized I didn't have much more to lose and I became willing. It was with trembling (the physical effects of that last episode left me shaking and sick) that I walked back into that Alcoholics Anonymous meeting that day and began my journey into sobriety.
Well, that's my blog for today.
Love and prayers,