REFLECTIONS ON CHANGE, SPIRITUALITY, BELIEF, FAITH, PRAYER, AND MORE
Saturday, December 6, 2008
Sunday 12/7 - CHOOSING WITH FAITH
"CHOOSING WITH FAITH"
"To choose what is difficult all one's day, as if it were easy, that is faith." - W.H. Auden
Faith has allowed me the freedom from fear necessary to choose the more difficult path. The day I got sober for good, enough fear was replaced with just enough faith to allow me to begin to make the choices I had been unable and unwilling to make. The consequence of constantly failing to make the hard choices was my getting drunk. Prior to that day, I was seldom able to make the difficult choice, relying instead on the "easier, softer way". That way led to near destruction.
Being able to choose the difficult AS IF IT WERE EASY - that is another story - a goal I aspire to. As the years go by, these difficult decisions and actions become easier as my faith grows.
Chronologically, here are some of the difficult choices I have made as a result of a growing faith: Admitted my complete powerlessness over alcohol Admitted I would die if I continued to drink Went to treatment for my alcoholism Allowed professionals to treat my chronic depression Divorce Not drinking "no matter what"! Wrote a Grant for funds and submitted to the State of Florida Made presentations of grant results to a State committee Led training sessions for large and small groups of people Made presentations at professional conferences Allowed God to use me to help total strangers Retired Shared my poems Attended RCIA and became Catholic Bought a motor scooter when I didn't know how to ride Learned to ride a motor scooter Ride a motor scooter all around town Became a hospital pastoral care assistant Began blogging
I did all these things despite great fear. I still have fear - fear of failure, fear of what you will think of me, fear of being embarrassed, all kinds of fear, but the fears lessen as time goes by. The fear lessens as my faith in God grows.
What are some of the difficult choices you have been able to make through faith?
I'm sober in AA since July 5th 1985, and a grateful member of Alanon since November 2004.
I joined the "blogosphere" in September, 2008.
In December 2011 I became a grandmother for the first time and now understand why it's such a big deal. I'm wildly in love again with that little guy.