REFLECTIONS ON CHANGE, SPIRITUALITY, BELIEF, FAITH, PRAYER, AND MORE
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
Thursday 3/18/10 - "SWEET REMEMBERING - PART 1"
I'm thinking about the patterns of my life and the rich variety of experiences that make up the "me" I have become. I have many wonderful memories, many painful ones, and lots in between. It has taken most of my life, but today I love the "me" I am and it took every experience I have had to bring me to this place.
I remember my childhood in Silver Spring, Maryland, a suburb of Washington, D.C. There are so many memories of a childhood filled with play. I was such a sensitive child and emotionally I became very twisted inside, but I believe the fantasy and play life I led with my neighborhood friends provided a little balance to that pain. It provided escape. We ran in packs around our block playing hide-and-seek, spinning ourselves around til we fell down dizzy, catching fireflies at dusk, climbing trees to live in imaginary tree houses or in the fall to jump into piles of leaves below.
When I was a little older we explored a deserted mansion in the area weaving make believe stories of the people who had lived there. Two sisters and I put on a play for our families in my living room, "Little Women". It has been so long I don't remember what part I played, but I still have a picture of us with our shawls around our shoulders and our parents, our audience, sitting around the edges of the big room.
I remember my first bicycle with training wheels and how proud I was the day those wheels came off and I remained upright on that bike. It became my horse and I the cowgirl in her cowgirl outfit rode that horse everywhere. I was equipped with saddlebags to carry my most special things, a water container, and my rifle. My horse bike and I explored a broader world together.
Mixed up thoughts and feelings grew in me as I grew older, but God was good and sweet memories continued in spite of myself. I will sit with these memories for now, savor them, and save some for a later post.
I am feeling very nostalgic and I am allowing the sweetness, the goodness of those memories to lift my soul.
(Photo credit: Autumn's Child by Pinktutu@deviantart.com)
I'm sober in AA since July 5th 1985, and a grateful member of Alanon since November 2004.
I joined the "blogosphere" in September, 2008.
In December 2011 I became a grandmother for the first time and now understand why it's such a big deal. I'm wildly in love again with that little guy.