Sunday 11/8/09 - "BLESSING THE ANIMALS "

"BLESSING THE ANIMALS"

I'll start with a follow-up comment of my own about yesterdays blog, "Lucky & Bert".

The six words, "Peace is a work in progress" can be clarified at the present moment in this way:
Progress is very slow
Peace seems to be a very distant possibility
It will take a lot of work
I have faith

This is why I chose for my blog a photo of a mural, "The Blessing of the Animals", depicting St. Francis of Assisi who had such love for all living creatures.

I ask St. Francis to bless the progress towards peace that Lucky and Bert are making.

Some other blessings I ask God for:

Please bless alcoholics and addicts everywhere who are:
Not even aware yet of the disease they harbor in their mind, body, and spirit. May their lives bring them to a place of awareness and subsequent surrender that they may discover the possibility of health and a new life

Newly sober and straight people struggling to live one day at a time without using a substance to cope with life. Place in their lives recovering people, circumstances, and experiences that will encourage them to "go to any lengths" to hold on to their new lives.

Sober and straight for years, but struggling with situations that are challenging. Help them remember that their sobriety is the most important thing in their lives, to reach out for help, and rely on God for the strength they lack.

I pray blessings for the many who have lost their jobs, had their work hours cut, or are in fear of losing their livelihood. May they live in today and rely on God for their daily bread.

Bless those who are being or have been abused in any way. Knowing that God can turn even the worst of experiences to the good, we ask God to guide us.

Today has been another very busy and emotional day. Time to pull the shades on this 24 hours, turn out the lights, and sleep in the care of God.

Goodnight to all you bloggers. I love you.

Prayer Girl

Saturday 11/7/09 - "LUCKY & BERT"

SIX WORD SATURDAY
"LUCKY & BERT"

PEACE IS A WORK IN PROGRESS!

Prayer Girl

Friday 11/6/09 - "BETWEEN THE ATOMS"

FLASH FICTION FRIDAY 55

"BETWEEN THE ATOMS"

It slipped into my soul on breath of gentle breeze
Arrived on unseen angels' whispering willowy wings
Came captured in the wispy Queen Anne's airy lace
Was layered in the vibrant colors bright, as butterflies alight

Thank God my gaze was held between the atoms' silent spiraling spaces small
For there, was love, in all

Prayer Girl

Flash Fiction Friday 55
is a story written in exactly 55 words.
Let the G-Man know if you write one
and read the ones of your fellow writers.

Thursday 11/5/09 - "FEAR WILL LEAVE US"

First - thank you Dream Dancer for this blog award.
I appreciate the award and your kind words written on your blog.
Love you much.

"FEAR OF PEOPLE AND OF
ECONOMIC INSECURITY
WILL LEAVE US"

("Alcoholics Anonymous", p. 84 - 9th 9th step promise)

I just realized that I never finished my blog series on the 9th step promises. The last one written was the 8th promise and that was blogged on 9/13/09. Life has sidetracked me. I'm ready, at least for today, to pick up where I left off. That brings me to the 9th promise, "Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us."

In the beginning of my sobriety I was filled with fears of all kinds. Many of them were nameless, but there were plenty I could put a label on. I was unemployed and unemployable at the end of my drinking. Eventually I did get a job, but it paid barely over minimum wage. Within a year or so I was separated and then divorced. I had two children to care for and though I got the house, I also got the mortgage. My car was old and prone to breaking down. I was in constant fear that I would not be able to pay my bills. I was forever filling out pieces of paper with lines down the center. On one side would be the income figures and on the other side of the line the expenses. It was always in the red and worried and talked about it a lot. But somehow I always managed to pay the bills month after month and year after year. Over the years my income increased and God continued to meet my financial needs in His way. Through these experiences, I have lost that fear of economic insecurity. I know today that God will take care of me as long as I do my part.

The job I found was surely God-sent, but that did not prevent me from fearing the people I worked for and with. I was in fear that I would not do a good enough job, fear that I would disappoint my employer. I was even fearful of other people in the rooms of Alcoholics Anonymous. I know now that most of my fear of people stemmed from my perfectionism, people-pleasing personality, and plain old low self-esteem. I was afraid to approach people talking in groups after an AA meeting. I was sure that my presence would be intrusive. What a horrible feeling. It probably took at least a year for that to improve. I finally came to believe that people really could just like me the way I was. I know now that I came to this belief when I finally accepted and liked myself.

These changes in me came about as a result of not drinking and working the steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. What a miracle it is to watch a life be transformed as the result of doing the work required by the steps. I experienced this miracle myself and am awed every time I watch these same changes in a sponsee or other newcomer.

How grateful I am to live a life without the burden of overwhelming fears. There is power in the steps - of that I am sure.

Prayer Girl
(Photo credit: against the tide by midnightskies7 at deviant art.com)

Wednesday 11/4/09 - "I AM ALONE"

ALMOST WORDLESS WEDNESDAY
"I AM ALONE"

I call this an almost wordless Wednesday because I have blogged this poem before. It is my favorite, most cherished one and these pictures are a visual expression of the words I wrote.

I AM ALONE

I am alone
Amidst a wide expanse
Of flame and frenzy bright
I tower far above
A meadow bursting forth
In wild, profuse delight

I am alone
Yet know a voice
Of petals bending in the breeze
I reach to hear
Yet only catch the wind
I listen past my ears

And I hear the vastness
Of the thousand petals
Stretching out beyond my sight
A feather bed in which to lie
Cascade around my head
A velvet, silk-soft coverlet

And I am not alone
Nor alien in their midst
They offer forth their honey scent
Show off their coverings bright
Bend gently to my softest touch
And whisper we are one

Prayer Girl

Tuesday 11/3/09 - "DOG, CAT, AND ME MAKE THREE"

"DOG, CAT, AND ME MAKE THREE"

Though we have not had dog Lucky and cat Bert anywhere near water and this is not a picture of our beloved pets, this picture does depict the scene in our house much of the time.

This picture captures the reverse of what normally happens. Kitty seems to be rubbing up against doggy's head. What really goes on is dog is pushing his head into kitty at every possible moment.

This is the goal. Will it ever happen? Time will tell.

Daughter will be leaving tomorrow morning for 28 days and the love, care, and training of "the animals" will be in the hands of hubby and me. Both animals display a certain obsession for each other. Doggy wants to play and be great friends with kitty. Kitty, on the other hand, wants to hiss, spit, swipe out with his paws and generally try to put dog in his place. At the same time, Kitty will "egg on" the dog and almost lures him to harass him.

The players in this drama are ill-matched. Bert is about 14 years old and weighs 12 pounds. Lucky is 2 years old and weighs 85 pounds. Bert is old and set in his ways. Lucky is a youngster full of playful puppiness. Of the two, I think the one who is more likely to be open to "training" and change is Mr. Dog.

I will be using every tool I have learned in my years of sobriety. The twelfth step directs me to practice these Alcoholics Anonymous principles in ALL MY AFFAIRS. Doing my part to foster reduction or the taming down of the skirmishes between Lucky and Bert fall into this category. I need to practice, practice, practice patience, persistence, and being kind in my treatment and guidance of both animals.

I will keep my blogging friends updated on any and all progress.

Prayer Girl

Monday 11/2/09 - "THINKING OF SILENCE"

"THINKING OF SILENCE"

Tonight I am thinking of silence and it is bringing peace and calm. I am thankful that a dear Al-Anon friend gave me this reminder recently when she heard about the changes coming in my life. She told me to remember to take a 15 minute break, a rest, anytime I feel like I need a moment of renewal.

I am grateful for Mother Teresa's beautiful words that brought to my heart the awareness of the holiness of silence. I have quoted this before, but I never tire of repeating it.

"In silence He listens to us; in silence He speaks to our souls. In silence we are granted the privilege of listening to His voice.
Silence of our eyes.
Silence of our ears.
Silence of our mouths.
Silence of our minds.
...in the silence of the heart God will speak."
---Mother Teresa from "No Greater Love"

I thank God that just for today I was able to bring my mind back into the moment and focus on where my feet were when my mind wandered to the dead and gone past or the 'may never happen' future. This is a miracle for me.

I am surprised and happy that I was able to cram so much into this first Sunday of the end of daylight savings time. I was awake and up long enough to say good morning to hubby, daughter, doggy, and kitty before taking off to my favorite Starbucks. I got my double tall, extra hot, skinny vanilla latte to sip during my home group Al-Anon meeting. After the meeting, it was a stop at the grocery store, home to make lunch for all of us, and a trip to Target and the local shopping mall. Once home we had dog needs to attend to and then I made dinner. We had pork tenderloin on our George Foreman Grill (one of my favorites), some of the freshest and sweetest corn on the cob, and baked potato. It was after doing the dishes that I remembered to go lie down and rest. And that brings me to this post and my gratitude for the level of energy I was able to maintain to accomplish all the happenings of this day.

Tomorrow, Monday, I'll be back to volunteering at the hospital. I didn't go last Monday. Daughter had just arrived and it was her birthday (a very emotional time). I feel ready to return tomorrow.

I have had a few new readers stop by my blog and leave comments or become followers and this makes me very happy. And I am always filled with joy when I hear from you bloggers that I have come to know as friends.

Love and prayers to all my blogger friends.

Prayer Girl