Sunday, February 28, 2010

Monday 3/1/10 - "HULA HOOPS"

"HULA HOOPS"

The alternate title for this blog is "Two Kinds of Business".

Writing a blog is a wonderful way to reinforce the truths I am learning in Al-Anon. My brain is like a sieve, it leaks. I need repetition to keep the good stuff in my mind.

One of my favorites is, "There are two types of business: my business and none of my business." Another way of visualizing this is to imagine I am dropping a hula hoop down over my head and everything inside the hoop is my business and everything outside of it is not.

This also reminds me that I can live only my own life's journey. I cannot live another person's journey for them. It is important that I honor the journey that others are taking. I have learned to honor mine. I am also reminded to keep the focus off of the other person - what you're doing, thinking or feeling and to keep my focus on me and my own recovery.

What is the payoff when I put all these things into practice? I find serenity, peace of mind and a nearness to God.

We all live with others whether at home, work or other places. Conflicts happen. We're all human. It is far too easy for me to take the inventory of the other person when there is conflict. I need to stick to taking my own inventory. What I find lacking in myself I can improve with the steps and tools of Al-Anon.

Discovering the character flaws in others is pointless since I am powerless over other people, places, and things. Discovering my own flaws is productive. I can work on changing myself with the help of God.

I heard a really good idea in my home group Al-Anon meeting this morning. A woman shared that anytime she realizes she is drifting into some other person's business she can get her own attention focused back to her own business by touching her nose. It brings her back to inside her own hula hoop. This can be done without attracting any attention by just scratching or casually touching the side of the nose. She said it works. I'm going to try it.

I am praying I stay in my own hula hoop today. :)

Prayer Girl

(Photo credit: hula hoop by Betty Sonics@deviantart.com)

14 comments:

Paula said...

Oh yes, I am just learning and practicing these two styles of business. It is such a relief. Have a great start into the week. Hugs form Tampa

Steve E said...

(Me, scratching my nose): "REALLY??"

And PG, I thought you had a rash or something on your nose today!

As for a hula hoop, I could use one, for other than keeping to my own business--maybe for hula-ing?

ME!

Kathy M. said...

Hula Hoop. I like that. I also like the part about discovering other people's flaws being pointless. I'd never heard it expressed that way. And touching my nose. I'm going to try that. I love how blogging gives me new tools. Thanks.

God Whispers In The Wind said...

Oh this was great. Love the two types of businesses. Have to remember that next time. Thank you dear one for sharing. Blessings.

Marcia said...

Love this!

Brian Miller said...

i cant hula hoop...not very good. my 7 year old can. i hear what you are saying about staying in your own hula hoop.

Jess Mistress of Mischief said...

Hula Hoops take lots of practice, oh and staying in the circle :) Both good things for a gal like me. makes me stand in place a while and focus on the repetative movement of the hoop, catching the rhythm. :)

This is a great reflection today!

Lou said...

So you and I have a similar blog space?!? Great minds think alike..LOL

I love the slogans, they keep me on track!

Cat said...

Ya know before I found the program of al anon I was so intimidated and affected by what I thought others thought of me... and after I heard this ssaying, something in my head went, " aha!". It has helped me so much to remember its not my business what other people think...

Have a wonderful March my friend!

sarah said...

great post. so true....love the pic. Sarah

Syd said...

Really good thoughts here. I now recognize what is my business and what isn't. It is a powerful thing.

Sherry said...

I loved your post - I was just talking about this to a friend today - how sometimes I tend to give "unsolicited" advice to friends/family! The "nose" idea is great...have a great week!

Sherry

Enchanted Oak said...

I'm partial to that hula hoop analogy. It really works to show us the small area that is our business. Sometimes I step way outside my hula hoop, and just the thought of that little round circle of influence reels me back in. I'm glad we're not all perfect. Takes some of the heat off me!

Superfluous Brunette said...

Great advice! This is what I do, focus on the other..even when I know it is not productive. In a way, figuring out someone else's issues (in this case my ex) I was able to pull myself out of my self defeating beliefs of "I am not good enough, loveable enough" a little BUT they keep coming back, no matter how much I know or think I know about his issues (a former alcoholic years before I ever met him)...so I will try to pull myself back onto focussing on me...and not just the shadow beliefs which is where I seem to go. Perhaps Al-Anon may be good for me, even though I have never been in a relationship with an active alchoholic...although my Dad was one when I was young, soooo...