"QUIZZICAL"(puzzlement, questioning)
"Who me? An alcoholic?"
"Let's see, am I really an alcoholic?"
"Uh, I'm not really sure I'm an alcoholic!"
"I don't really think I'm actually an 'alcoholic'."
"I can't be an alcoholic, can I?"
"No way I'm an alcoholic!"
These are just a few of the statements and questions I hear from people who:
look like a duck
quack like a duck
and
walk like a duck- -
BUT don't think they are a duck.
(DUCK = ALCOHOLIC)
What these statements really mean are:
"I don't want to be an alcoholic."
"I don't accept that I am an alcoholic."
"I don't approve of the fact that I'm alcoholic."
"OMG, you mean I won't be able to drink again?"
Etc., etc., etc.
I guess this is no surprise considering that alcoholism is a 'disease of denial' and that it is the only disease that tells us we don't have a disease. Heaven help the alcoholic whose life is being destroyed by their own insane thinking, emotions, and behaviors (as well as the destruction of lives of those close to them) and are unable to see themselves.
In my case, denial took the form of a totally blank mind. I did not process anything said that included the words alcohol, alcoholism, drinking, how many drinks, or anything along those lines. I simply didn't respond, didn't answer, or made up words that came out of my mouth.
When we read in meetings from "How it Works" in our Big Book, "Alcoholics Anonymous", p. 60, it says:
"Our description of the alcoholic, the chapter to the agnostic, and our personal adventures before and after make clear three pertinent ideas:
(a) That we were alcoholic and could not manage our own lives.
(b) That probably no human power could have relieved our alcoholism.
(c) That God could and would if He were sought."
I believe God can and does use people and circumstances to help wake people up from their denial, but ultimately it is God alone who gives the gift that allows a person to finally wake up to the truth. It is the truth in the statement, "Yes, I really am an alcoholic" that sets us free.
My prayer is that those still living in the darkness of denial will seek God. God can and does relieve alcoholism.
Prayer Girl
10 comments:
Oh how true!!
Yes, your words speak truth. Everyone in my daughter's circle has seen the truth, except her. I know God can change things, if He is allowed into our hearts and lives. Blessings :)
i'll never forget the first few times is started googling alcoholism was reading the statement: if you think you may have a problem, you probably do...
There are so many tools for the alcoholic to use and so much support and education for family members about this disease, but God is in the middle of everyone's change. It's all just too miraculous.
Alcoholics Anonymous is the largest organization in the world of people who never wanted to be there! And I thought I was the only one :o)
Amen
I always said I was an alcoholic. My problem was the other thing you said, "You mean I can never drink again?"
I knew I was an alcoholic
for 25 years...I just didn't
care.
I was in denial about doing
God's will, not about my status
as an alcoholic.
I go to meetings because I
have a problem with egomania.
Thank you for showing up and
telling the truth.
Pete.
thank you to AA for helping so many see their real selves, after all if there were no AA there would be no NA.
I like the duck analogy. I agree. Denial seems to be a universal problem these days.
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