"TURNING IT OVER""I know I am powerless to deal with my problem by myself. The more I struggle to work it out, the more difficult it becomes. I know that Divine Power can deal with matters which are beyond me. I will try to empty my mind of all fear."
"God does not deprive us of His love; we deprive Him of our cooperation. God would never reject me if I had not first rejected his love." (St. Francis de Sales)
(From: "One Day at a Time in Al-Anon" January 28, p. 28)
Why do I keep forgetting that I am powerless not only over alcohol, but over all of my problems as well? Is it because I'm human? Is it because my mind is like a sieve - it leaks and I forget? Or is it because my default position programmed into me as a child is one of fear and depression?
It's all of the above. I will not master these facts in this lifetime. Therefore, I need to continue to grow in my spiritual connection to God. I need to continue to work my Alcoholics Anonymous and Al-Anon programs. I must live the steps of those programs, go to meetings, work with others, and stay connected with the messages of these programs. If I fail to do my part, I will slip back into old thinking and old behaviors. This produces fear, worry, and depression.
What did I do yesterday to do my part? I went to the dentist which was taking care of myself. I met with an Al-Anon sponsee and we completed her 12th step. How spiritual it is for me to watch someone else's spiritual awakening happen.
What am I doing today to do my part? I have spoken with an AA friend and will see her at an AA meeting at noon. She called to invite me to a 'game night' at her home this Saturday night. I will go and be around other recovering friends having fun. That will be good for my spirit. Before I started this blog, I spent an hour on the phone with an AA/Al-Anon sponsee. Her life in the past few years has been filled with devastation - the loss of a son, very ill elderly parents, and more. She is now rounding the bend, coming to terms with her difficulties and even experiencing some joy and hope in her life. I am thanking God for her progress.
Today daughter has a second interview (a panel interview) for a job. She has been unemployed and unable to find a job for a year and a half. I am turning it over - and over and over. I know that she has done all that she can do to do her best. I told her if she gets the job, it was meant to be and if she doesn't, it wasn't meant to be. I need to repeat this to myself over and over.
Pray for her. Her interview is today at 3 p.m.
God bless your day.
Prayer Girl
(Photo credit: Peculiar Storm by GeeeO@deviantart.com)
12 comments:
Thanks again PG. I agree all of the above. Fear, perceptions and expectations can keep me from putting my complete trust in God. Staying busy, working with others, doing things for my spiritual, mental and physical health allow me to focus in on the "now" if I am willing.
I learn from these thoughts
that admission of powerlessness
is the 1st step in turning
over ourselves to God.
Pete.
I will pray that your daughter gets the job if it's meant to be. Thank you for your post today. I read your excerpt from One Day at a Time and realized I had read yesterday's reading for today. I went back to today's and was encouraged. (Please see my blog.) Wish you could be my Al Anon sponsor. (Is there such a thing as cyber sponsoring???) Everything I "hear" in your blog speaks to me. Blessings to you today.
I agree fear and doubt are default positions. It takes less time (in the short term) than spiritual growth. I have to keep reminding myself to keep my eye on the prize..hope, serenity, and eternal life.
Prayers said for your daughter..
Prayers said. I have 2 that are looking for jobs. I have to remember to keep my mouth shut. It isn't easy sometimes but they will be just fine without my opinions :-D
namaste
The St. Frances quote is the BEST. Thank you for this, PG.
the battle for control has led to my largest downfalls. happens less and less these days , but...
She is in the interview right now. I will send a lot of positive thoughts her way. It's good that you are accepting.
God grant me the serenity... good thoughts going your way!
I hope that the interview went well for her. I love how you evaluated the progress through your day.
Thank you SO much for your thoughtful and marvelously organized thought! Seriously, I think I turn things over to God 16-60 times a day. Progress not perfection.
So much wisdom in so few words. I often struggle to keep God and the spiritual principles of AA at the center of my day. I get caught up in some little detail and later think, "boy, why didn't I turn that over?" But this is a process and I'm confident in God's grace :)
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