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"ON TRUSTING GOD, HELPING OTHERS,
AND RELATIONSHIP"
TRUSTING GOD
"You must always remember that you are weak but that God is strong. God knows all about your weakness. He hears every cry for mercy, every sign of weakness, every plea for help, every sorrow over failure, every weakness felt and expressed. We only fail when we trust too much to our own strength. Do not feel bad about your weakness. When you are weak, that is when God is strong to help you."
From "Twenty-Four Hours a Day", October 7
HELPING OTHERS
"The best cure for worry, depression, melancholy, brooding, is to go deliberately forth and try to lift with one's sympathy the gloom of somebody else." - Arnold Bennett
RELATIONSHIP
"...alcoholism not only exists inside the body of the alcoholic, but is a disease of relationships as well." From "Paths to Recovery", p. 8
"Since defective relations with other human beings have nearly always been the immediate cause of our woes, including our alcoholism, no field of investigation could yield more satisfying and valuable rewards than this one." From "Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions", p. 80
RELATIONSHIP CHANGE:
ORIGINAL RELATIONSHIP
A + B = C
where:
A = you
B = the other person
C = the relationship
Fact: you can not change the other person (B)
Fact: the relationship (C) is made up of two people, A & B
Fact: since you can't change the other person (B), you can't change the relationship (C) by changing B
Fact: you can change yourself with God's help
Fact: If you want a relationship to change, then you must change yourself
Fact: If you change, then you become D
Fact: If you change, then the relationship becomes E
NEW RELATIONSHIP:
D + B = E
Concerning relationships from "Hope For Today", p. 60, February 29
"I realized that I could transform "a" (myself) and get a different "c" (relationship), even if (b) (the alcoholic) never changed."
Alcoholics Anonymous and Al-Anon have allowed me to change. All my relationships have changed for the better as a result. How grateful I am.
Prayer Girl
I thank Jess Mistress of Mischief for this Gratitude Award. I love her blog, Journey of the Spirit of Hope..trudging the road of happy destiny! You can go on over and see it - just (click here)."GRATITUDE AWARD"
We create the world we 'see'.
Our attitudes shape our realities.
Since I received a Gratitude Award it is only fitting that my blog be about my gratitude.
- I am grateful for the change in how I see the world and the attitudes I hold today.
- I am grateful that I no longer see the world through eyes that desire to run, hide, or leave this world.
- I am grateful that today I see the world through the eyes of faith, trust, and hope.
- I have gratitude that I see the glass as half full - not half empty. Whenever that view begins to shift to 'less than', I have the tools to shift the perspective back to 'more than'.
- I am grateful for developing a belief in the power of prayer and the willingness to utilize that power.
- I am grateful that through experience I know that God answers prayer.
- I am grateful for Alcoholics Anonymous which saves my life and Al-Anon that expands the richness of my life, of my relationships.
- I am grateful for the 12 steps that showed me the path to my God.
- I am grateful that I ws able to finally set aside my "contempt prior to investigation", use affirmations, and experience their power.
- I am grateful for delicious Vanilla Lattes and Caramel Macchiato espresso drinks.
- I am grateful for my husband - that God saw fit that we meet, that we recognized His hand in our relationship, and that we sealed our lives as one the day we married.
- I am grateful for God's hand guiding my son and his new wife to seal their lives as one.
- I am grateful that my world of wonderful possibilities grows daily.
- I am grateful for the inspiration I find in the writings of my blog friends.
- I am grateful for each sponsee and recovering friend God brings into my life.
- I am grateful for the deep spiritual connections recovery has allowed me to experience.
- I am grateful for God's help with each poem and blog that I write and each picture I paint.
- I am grateful for God's unconditional love for and guidance given me, my husband, my children, and the bloggers I have met - especially those with serious health, relationship, financial, or other difficulties.
- I am grateful to be "Prayer Girl".
(Photo credit: woman praying by David MacDonald)
(Another 'problem person'!!!)"PROBLEM PEOPLE"
This blog is dedicated to all of us who from time to time or perhaps even more often have 'problem people' in our lives. These people may be causing problems of a minor, but irritating variety or they may present problems for us that are deeper, more troubling, and defy resolution. Sometimes they are people we don't like and sometimes ones we love dearly. God bless any of you who have 'never' had this type of situation.
Please let me know on which planet you live. :)
I am so grateful for the wisdom available through the programs of Alcoholics Anonymous and Al-Anon and their literature.
On March 7th and again on March 11th I read the entries in "Daily Reflections". I was impressed by them and they brought this blog topic to mind.
Daily Reflections, March 7, p. 75:
"The willingness to give up my pride and self-will to a Power greater than myself has proved to be the only ingredient absolutely necessary to solve all of my problems today. Even the smallest amount of willingness, if sincere, is sufficient to allow God to enter and take control over any problem, pain, or obsession."
AND
Daily Reflections, March 11, p. 79:
"All I have to do is look back at my past to see where my self-will has led me. I just don't know what's best for me and I believe my Higher Power does. G.O.D., which I define as "Good Orderly Direction," has never let me down, but I have let myself down quite often. Using my self-will in a situation usually has the same result as forcing the wrong piece into a jigsaw puzzle - exhaustion and frustration. "
The last sentence in the above excerpt is one way I can measure whether I am using my self-will to try to fix a problem or I'm relying on God's will. How much exhaustion and frustration am I experiencing? Said another way, the opposite is how much peace and serenity am I experiencing in the midst of whatever problem situation exists?
When I think I have a problem with someone else's behavior, I need to remember that I most certainly have a problem with myself. This is actually good news since the only person I have any hope of changing is me.
Trying to fix, change, control, or coerce the person with a problem to change will surely lead to anxiety and frustration. I need to remember the three Cs I have learned in Al-Anon. I did not cause whatever the problem is, I can't cure it, and I certainly can't control it.
All my efforts to control someone else point out the need I have for God's help. It's so easy to see what is wrong with others, but this is of little use to me. I need to become aware of what is wrong in me, become willing to have God heal me, and then ask Him to do so.
I cannot change or fix anyone else. God is the only power able to do this. He does not need my help, but he can use my cooperation.
I need always remember that my most powerful tool is prayer - prayers for myself and prayers for the person with the problem. After prayer comes faith and trust that the God of my understanding has heard and will work things out in His perfect timing. And - I must do my part.
Thank God for AA and Al-Anon.
Prayer Girl
(Photo credit: By findstuff22)
